Yesterday’s rampage by a crazed Hitlery fan really underscores a recent study which demonstrated that, while Republicans have excellent mental health, Democrats and schizophrenic Independents do not. But I think we knew that already, didn’t we?
Republicans are significantly more likely than Democrats or independents to rate their mental health as excellent, according to data from the last four November Gallup Health and Healthcare polls. Fifty-eight percent of Republicans report having excellent mental health, compared to 43% of independents and 38% of Democrats. This relationship between party identification and reports of excellent mental health persists even within categories of income, age, gender, church attendance, and education.
Conclusion? Moonbats are the ka-waziest people!
Perhaps that Democrat urban legend about President Reagan evilly throwing all the mentally ill out onto America’s streets has some merit after all. That would certainly help to explain the election of Slick Willie in 1992, the unhinged reaction to the Goracle’s defeat in 2000, hanging chads, Florida Democrats voting for Pat Buchannan, 9/11 conspiracy theories, Bush Lied People Died (TM), another “stolen election” in 2004 (Goracle II), Nancy Piglosi, the Ron Paultard Revilution, and Cindy Sheehag. No wait, scratch that. Nothing can explain that last one.
Once a Republican President is inevitably sworn in on January 20, 2008, perhaps his first item of business should be to launch a Leftist Mental Health Initiative. Let us build a multitude of loony bins across the nation, from sea to shining sea, to once again house the unhinged leftists that currently run rampant across our nation. Perhaps we should just fence off San Francisco. Duncan Hunter could certainly build that wall. And we can then invest in keyless padlocks to ensure they are kept safe from the outside world forever. It’s the humane thing to do.
Liberalism is a mental disorder, to be sure. Let’s help these poor delusional folks by locking them up so that they will no longer be a danger to themselves and others. Let us show ourselves to be true “compassionate conservatives,” in the best sense of the term, by investing our hard earned money so that these poor unfortunates can be safely segregated from society where they can receive the care they so desperately need for the remainder of their miserable and useless lives. It’s the least we can do.
Exit question: When will the WHO finally declare BDS to be an officially recognized mental illness? Democratic Underground breathlessly awaits your prognosis and merciful committal. Basket weaving, anyone?
They’re coming to take me away, ha-haaa.
They’re coming to take me away, ho ho, he he, ha ha,
To the funny farm, where life is beautiful all the time
And I’ll be happy to see those nice young
Men in their clean white coats and
They’re coming to take me away, ha-haaa!
Madness courtesy of Napoleon XIV.
Hat Tip: Hot Air.